others
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Four Men in a Helicoptor
in JokesFour business men are flying over the the UK having tea and taking in the sites The first man who is English looks out of the window and cries “Ah there is my beautiful England” A while later the second man who is Irish looks out and criess “There is my beautiful Ireland” A while…
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Excuses – Part 3
in JokesHere are some excuses if someone asks you to do something with them… I’d love to, but I prefer to remain an enigma. I’d love to, but I think you want the OTHER [your name]. I’d love to, but I have to sit up with a sick aunt. I’d love to, but I’m trying to…
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Twin Towers
in JokesIt is the year 2032, and a father and his son walk the streets of lower Manhattan. Approaching the site where the WTC used to be in the end of the 20th century, the father sighs and comments, “To think that right here used to be the Twin Towers.” The son, not understanding, asks his…
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10 Reasons Why You Should Eat Candy
in Jokes1. It is the new hip thing to rot your teeth. 2. They are highly non-nutritous. 3. In case of weak teeth, just bite into the hard candy. 4. For absolutely no good reason. 5. Makes you sick so that you do not have to go to school. 6. To get hyperactive so that you…
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barbershop
in JokesA guy walks in to the barbershop. barber says, “What will it be today?” Guy says, “Well, I want it going with my waves on top, faded on one side, plug the other, and just make it all out of shape and messed up.” barber says, “Now why in the world do you want your…
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Labelings
in JokesThese are real labelings on real products that they sell around the world. On a bar of Dial soap: “Directions: Use like regular soap.” (And that would be how?…) On some Swanson frozen dinners: “Serving suggestion: Defrost.” (But it’s just a SUGGESTION.) On Tesco’s Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): “Do not turn upside down.” (Hmm,…
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Weird Facts VIII
in JokesWomen blink nearly twice as much as men. Your stomach has to produce a new layer of mucus every two weeks; otherwise it will digest its self. The largest fish is the whale shark-it can be over 50 feet long and weigh 2 tons. The only continent without native reptiles or snakes is Antarctica.
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Hitler and Mussolini
in JokesOne day St. Peter visited Hell to make certain that the sinners were being adequately punished. During his tour he noticed that Hitler was standing in feces up to his chin. Surprisingly, the Fuhrer was smiling. “I don’t understand,” sasid St. Peter. “How can you smile when you’ll be spending all of eternity in excrement?”…
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Politically Correct Ethnic Jokes
in Jokes1) A person belonging to an ethnic group whose members are commonly considered to have certain stereotypical mannerisms met another person belonging to a different ethnic group with a different set of imputed stereotypical mannerisms. The first person acted in a manner consistent with the stereotypes associated with his ethnic group, and proceeded to make…
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Amazing Facts 7
in Jokes# In 1875 the director of the US patent office resigned. He said that there was nothing left to invent # The Channel between England and France grows about 300 millimeters each year # The average person’s field of vision encompasses a 200-degree wide angle # Offered a new pen to write with, 97% of…
