others

19 Ways To Annoy/Confuse Santa Claus ———————————————————- 1.) Instead of milk and cookies, leave him a salad, and a note explaining that you think he could stand to lose a few pounds. 2.) While he’s in the house, go find his sleigh and write him a speeding ticket. 3.) Leave him a note, explaining that…

A Pakistani guy named Abdul was ringing in flour at his grocery store, and the bag broke, covering him with flour. Abdul rushes home to take a shower. He enters his house and his wife says to him, “Abdul, you’re white, what happened to you?” Abdul says “I was ringing in flour, the bag broke,…

One day at a school for the deaf (hearing impaired), they decide to have one of the students lead a pep rally for the football team. Here’s how it went. Rally leader: What are we gonna do? Ralliers: Defeat them! RL: I can’t hear you! R: Defeat them! RL: I can’t hear you! R: Defeat…

Two gas company servicemen, a senior training supervisor and a young trainee, were out checking meters in a suburban neighborhood. They parked their truck at the end of the alley and worked their way to the other end. At the last house, a woman looking out her kitchen window watched the two men as they…

Jack told me you told him that I told you that he was ugly, and I told you not to tell him I told you that! It’s his fault! I told him not to tell you I told him what you told me! Well, don’t let it happen again–and don’t tell him I told you…

The only thing the Internal Revenue Service has not yet taxed is the penis. This is due to the fact that 40% of the time it is hanging around unemployed. 30% of the time it is hard up, 20% of the time it is pissed off, and 10% of the time it’s in the hole.…

. We yell for the Government to balance the budget, then take the last dime we have to make the down payment on a car. We whip the enemy in battle, then give them the shirt off our backs. We yell for speed laws that will stop fast driving, then won’t buy a car if…

What is represented by this? STEPPETSPETS One step forward, two steps back!

What do you get when you see peas spinning in circles? World Peace (whirled peas)

Did you hear about the magic car? It turned into a driveway!

Here is a series of jokes my friend told me. They were hilarious, and I thought I should share it with everyone. Apologies for any dupes. You: Want to hear a corny joke? Them: Ok You: Where do you plant corns in a farm? Them: Don’t know. Where? You: At the CORNers You: Do you…

At one Army base, the annual trip to the rifle range had been cancelled for the second year in a row, but the semi-annual physical fitness test was still on as planned. One soldier mused, “Does it bother anyone else that the Army doesn’t seem to care how well we can shoot, but they are…