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British Columbia, Canada: Police officers on patrol about 1:00 am spotted 4 men breaking into a vehicle. They gave chase on foot, catching and arresting two of the men. The other two escaped. A couple of hours later, two men showed up at the main desk of the police station, asking when their buddies were…

16 more white keys than black keys on a piano.

This is the conversation from “That 70s Show” when Fez first “does it.” Note: If you have never seen the show, these are, you guessed it, teenagers. Fez: Knock-knock. Kelso: Who’s there? Fez: I did it! *Everyone claps* Kelso: Wait, wait, I wanna hear this. I did it who? Eric: Wait a minute…this isn’t like…

What disease frightens ghosts the most? BoOoOo-bonic Plague What’s the difference between girl ghosts and boy ghosts? BoOoOo-bies

Interviewer : Give me the opposite words. Banta Singh : OK. Interviewer : Made in India. Banta Singh : Destroyed in Pakistan. Interviewer : Good …. Keep it up. Banta Singh : Bad …. Put it down. Interviewer : Maxi – mum Banta Singh : Mini – dad Interviewer : Enough! Take your seat. Banta…

#1 Every time you sneeze some of your brain cells die. #2 Historically, a blue ribbon has been awarded for first prize. #3 The motto of M-G-M movie studios is Art for Art’s Sake. #4 The lion that roars in the MGM logo is named “Volney.” #5 It cost 7 million dollars to build the…

Things some people learn as they “mature.” I’ve learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in. I’ve learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just jerks. I’ve learned that it takes years to build up trust, and…

In 1900, fathers prayed their children would learn English. Today, fathers pray their children will speak English. In 1900, if a father put a roof over his family’s head, he was a success. Today, it takes a roof, deck, pool, and 4-car garage. And that’s just the vacation home. In 1900, a father waited for…

A man is playing poker, and sees a sign that says: If You Have A Gambling Problem call 1-800-GAMBLING. So the man calls the hotline and says, “The guy on my right has an ace and a two, I have a three and a jack, there is a four, a five, and a queen on…

One day, Mr. Dorren’s first grade class was learning the alphabet. One of his students came up to Mr. Dorren and asked to go to the bathroom. Mr. Dorren said, “First, recite the alphabet.” The student started, “A, B… … L, M, N, O, Q…” When he finished, Mr. Dorren asked, “Where’s the ‘P’?” “Running…

GREAT TRUTHS THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED: 1) No matter how hard you try, you can’t baptize cats. 2) When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don’t let her brush your hair. 3) If your sister hits you, don’t hit her back. They always catch the second person. 4) Never ask your 3-year old…

cat: Situation joke: A lecher, a drunkard and a smoker arrive at hell and the devil says to them: “Don’t worry, everything is happy here. To you, lecher, I am going to give you a full room of beautiful girls. To you, drunkard, I give you a thousand boxes of beer. And to you, smoker,…