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Yes, being over 50 does have its advantages… 1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you. 2. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first. 3. No one expects you to run into a burning building. 4. People call at 9 p.m. and ask, “Did I wake you?” 5. People no longer…

Their was a very rich old lady that died.Before she died she gave all her money and stuff to her children and grandchildren. She had one thing left to give out. It was a diamond. She said she hid it in a cylinder with squares. A grandchild said he knew where it was. Where was…

3 men were on the way to Heaven, but God would only let the man with the worst death in. The first man says, “Well, I was on the way to my apartment because I suspected my wife was cheating on me. So when I got to my apartment on the 3rd story, my wife…

One day in summer, Jack was going to visit his friend John. When he got to his house, he saw John, who was dressed in his warmest winter coats. “What are you doing? Are you nuts? It’s the middle of summer!” cried Jack. “I am painting my house. And on the can, it says you…

“Hillary Clinton is the junior senator from the great state of New York. When they swore her in, she used the Clinton family Bible. You know, the one with only seven commandments.” – David Letterman

Beijing = Capital of China.

Share Critical Information Pertaining to Credit and Risk A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. After a few seconds of arguing over which one should go and answer the doorbell, the wife gives up, quickly wraps herself up in a towel and…

Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marajiuana, Jack got high and unzipped his fly and Jill said I don’t wanna.

1. Well, this day was a total waste of makeup. 2. Make yourself at home! Clean my kitchen. 3. A hard-on doesn’t count as personal growth. 4. Don’t bother me. I’m living happily ever after. 5. Do I look like a freakin’ people person? 6. This isn’t an office. It’s Hell with fluorescent lighting. 7.…

A lady is throwing a party for her granddaughter, and had gone all out….. a caterer, band, and a hired clown. Just before the party started, two bums showed up looking for a handout. Feeling sorry for the bums, the woman told them that she would give them a meal if they will help chop…

Why don’t blind people sky dive? Because it scares the crap outta the dog.

Q. What do you call Asians swimming in a pool? A. Cornflakes