puns

Two guys were walking along a road in Georgia when they were struck by a police car driven by a drunken cop. One guy was thrown through the windshield and his buddy was knocked down an embankment. The first guy was charged with breaking and entering; and the second with leaving the scene of an…

My geometry tutor told me, “A six-sided polygon is called a hexagon, a five-sided one is called a pentagon.” “What about two sided ones?” I asked. “They don’t exist,” was his response. “I beg to differ! I think we should just let bi-gons be bi-gons.”

Q: What did the older lightbulb say to the younger lightbulb? A: You’re too young to go out tonight.

Clones are people two.

How many ADHD kids does it take to change a lightbulb? It takes twenty se- hey, this is in the wrong cat!

You know you’re a redneck when your brand new tv is sitting on your old ones.

A Pokemon Trainer walks into a STD help center. The nurse there says “Sorry, but it looks like you’ve caught ’em all”

Q: What did the little chick say when his mom laid an orange? A: Look at the orange-mama-lade!

Movie stars are a reel treat!

A boy go to a girls house and notice her home is very messy and full of paper and clay pot and clothing all over. The boy tell her he bring some pot to her and she answer there is clay pot all over home.

A Russian couple were walking down the street in Moscow one night, when the man felt a drop hit his nose. “I think it’s raining,” he said to his wife. “No, that felt more like snow to me,” she replied. “No, I’m sure it was just rain,” he said. Well, as these things go, they…

A young man was in town looking for a little something from the ladies. A cab driver gave him an address and told him he could find anything he wanted there. When the young man arrived, he saw a door with a small panel on it. He knocked and the panel slid open. A female…