puns
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The Party III
in JokesA man goes to a fancy dress party, dressed from head to toe in green, carrying a woman on his back. The host asks, “What have you come as?” He replies, “I’m a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle!” The host says, “Why have you a woman on your back?” “Oh, that’s Michelle,” he replies. (My shell)
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The Fruit and Vegetable
in JokesVegetable: “Hey, lets get married.” Fruit: “I’m sorry.” Vegetable: “We could secretly get married.” Fruit: “No, we couldn’t.” Vegetable: “Why?” Fruit: “Because we can’t elope.” Can’t elope = cantelope
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Baskin Robins
in JokesOne day two robins walked along the road, planning their day. Robin #1:Oh my god, we totally have to get some bronzing oil! Robin #2:Duh, I mean if are going to spend the whole day at the beach we totally have to! That day while the robins were tanning on the beach a big bad…
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Skin and Bones
in JokesWhy don’t skeletons ever play music at church? Because they don’t have any organs!
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No Gnus is Good Gnus
in JokesThere was a family of gnus, and one day, Mr Gnu went out to get some food but was ambushed and eaten by a pride of lions. Next salute, a poacher shoots Mrs Gnu, leaving poor Baby Gnu to starve to death. Well, that’s the end of the gnus; here’s the weather . . .
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Farmer Has Problems
in JokesThere was once a very influential farmer in a remote part of China, who had a problem. His chickens were losing their feathers and dying. He sought the counsel of the two wise men in town, Hing, who was scientist, and Ming, who was a sorcerer. Hing, who has had many advanced course hours in…
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The Tollbooth
in JokesThe driver of a huge trailer lost control of his rig, plowed into an empty tollbooth and smashed it to pieces. He climbed down from the wreckage and within a matter of minutes, a truck pulled up and discharged a crew of workers. The men picked up each broken piece of the former tollbooth and…