puns

Two eggs sitting on a kitchen table, when one sees a whisk. He says to his friend, “Ooh, what’s that?” The friend replies, “Beats me!”

You are stuck in a room with absolutely no doors, no windows, and no escape. You are surrounded by 415 inch think metal walls. All you have is a mirror and a table. How do you get out? Well, you look into the mirror. You saw yourself, right? Now, use the saw to chop the…

What happens when the smog clears over southern California? UCLA

What do you call a drive-by shooting in Chinatown? A cappuchino.

If it weren’t for Venetian blinds, it would be curtains for everyjoke.

A golf ball is a golf ball, no matter how you putt it.

Q: Why could Long John Silver never find an aspirin? A: ‘Cause his parrots ate them all.

What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path? Tyrannosaurus wrecks

A foot. (leg-end)

Fe Fe Fe | / Fe –*– Fe / | Fe Fe Fe A ferris wheel

A young man worked at an aquarium feading the animals, cleaning the tanks and the like. One day his boss came to him and said, “We have a group of second-graders coming for a field trip in about thirty minutes and the dolphins are getting ‘playful’. The only thing that will make the dolphins behave…

In the future, man is exploring the universe. Due to the excessive cost, they can only send out small teams of explorers to search and investigate the millions of planets they come across. One such team lands on a barren planet that seems to be just one big rock. As they investigate, their sensors pick…