redneck

Two good ole boys down in Alabama were sitting around talking one afternoon over a cold beer…After a while the 1st guy says to the 2nd, “If’n I was to sneak over to your trailer Saturday & make love to your wife while you was off huntin’, and she got pregnant and had a baby,…

You might be a redneck if… You think the Gettysburg Address is where Lincoln lived.

You know you’re a Redneck if….. 1. Your child’s night-light is a neon beer sign. 2. The only running water in your house comes through the ceiling. 3. Your toilet paper has page numbers on it. 4. All your kids toys came free with a Happy Meal. 5. When you fill your car with gas,…

You might be a redneck if you ride the electric floorbuffer and mistake it for your wife!!

You are a legal heir to a fireworks stand.

You might be a redneck if you were married in a laundromat.

You Just Might Be A Redneck If… You’ve been married three times and still have the same in-laws. Jack Daniels makes your list of “Most Admired People.” You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean. Anyone in your family ever died right after saying, “Hey, y’all watch this!” You’ve got more than one…

You might be a redneck if your baby stroller consists of a potato sack and a wheelbarrow.

Why is Alabama the smartest state in the U.S.? It has four “A”s and a “B”.

How many dicks can a redneck girl take at a time? It depends on how many brothers she has.

Recently, my redneck neighbors invited me to a party. Here was our conversation: “Hey dude! Where are you man? We’re having a great party over here. Why don’t you come on over and join us?” I replied, “Man, I’m not feeling so good. I think I’m gonna stay right here.” “Well, hey. What’cha got?” they…

I thought Graceland was tacky. No kids in the back of the pick-up, it’s not safe. Do you think my hair is too big? Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace? The tires on that truck are too big. I’ve got it all on a floppy disk. Do you think this baseball cap goes…