sport

  • The Health Club

    I joined a health club last year, spent about $400, and haven’t lost a pound. Apparently, you have to show up.

  • Endless Love

    What’s the definition of Endless Love? Stevie Wonder playing Ray Charles at Tennis! Endless Love!

  • “Who’s on First?” By Abbott and Costello

    Abbott: Well Costello, I’m going to New York with you. You know Bookie Harris, the Yankee’s manager, gave me a job as coach for as long as you’re on the team. Costello: Look Abbott, if you’re the coach, you must know all the players. Abbott: I certainly do. Costello: Well you know I’ve never met…

  • The Idiot

    Soccer Coach: Why didn’t you stop the ball? New Goalie: I thought that was what the net was for!

  • On the Golf Course

    A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down…

  • The Root?

    What is the name of the baseball player who sits under a tree? Babe Root!

  • Play As it Lays

    Bill and Ralph, both of equal ability, decide to have a round together and “play it as it lays” on all shots. Both hit their tee shots on the par-5 first hole down the middle and about 260 yards. They drive up for the second shot, and Bill hits his shot down the middle for…

  • Semi-pro Baseball

    Egotistical Harry was always reminding people that he played semi-pro baseball. “I was the James Bond type of player,” he told his friends. “I had all sorts of tricks to confuse the opposition.” “Batted .007,” his wife added.

  • The Olympics

    Does it seem strange to you that the Olympics, the oldest and most famous sporting event, is the one televised event that the competitors don’t get cash. In fact, if you have ever made any money at all of your sport, you are disqualified. Its like, you win a gold medal and your like “So,…

  • Scoring Golf?

    I play in the low 80’s. If it is hotter than that, I won’t play.

  • Heaven vs Hell

    Hours after the end of the world, a border dispute emerged between heaven and hell. God, invited the devil for conversations to find a way to resolve this dispute quickly. Satan proposed a soccer game between heaven and hell. God, always fair, said to the devil, “The heat must be affecting your brain, the game…

  • Four Football Fans

    Four football fans go rock climbing one afternoon: a Patriots fan, a Falcons fan, an Eagles fan, and a Steelers fan. They had been arguing all the way up the mountain about who among them was the most “die-hard” fan. Upon reaching the top of the mountain, the Patriots fan proclaimed to the other three……