sport

One there was a wrestler in a very, very light weight wrestling match. He only weighed 135 pounds and his opponent even less than that. He was just about to wrestle that day when his coach dragged him off the ring. “I need to speak with him,” the coach called. “Why’d you take me out?”…

A vacationing golfer was out playing on a course that he had never played before. He hired a caddie from the pro shop to show him the layout of the course, and help him decide what shots to play. On the first tee, the golfer missed his shot, and it dribbled forward about 15 yards.…

Why is boxing a sport? If I beat someone up in an alley and someone sees it, I get arrested. If I beat someone up in an arena where thousands see it happen, I get cheered. I’ve done both. I like the alley better though.

An old man was in bed with his wife when suddenly he let out a loud fart. He yelled, “7 points!” His wife looked at him and said, “What the hell are you doing?” He simply replied, “Just playing bed football.” Ten minutes later the wife let a loud one and said, “Tie game –…

1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft’s all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can’t get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You…

At one point during a game, the coach said to one of his young players, “Do you understand what cooperation is? What a team is?” The little boy nodded in the affirmative. “Do you understand that what matters is whether we win together as a team?” The little boy nodded yes. “So,” the coach continued,…

A rookie pitcher was struggling at the mound, so the catcher walked up to have a talk with him. “I’ve figured out your problem,” he told the young southpaw. “You always lose control at the same point in every game.” “When is that?” “Right after the National Anthem.”

If you ask a Bears fan what his or her two favorite teams are they would be: – The Bears – And whoever the Green Bay Packers are playing.

Three guys enter a disabled swimming contest. The first has no arms. The second no legs and the third has no joke, just a head. They all line up, the whistle blows and “splash” they’re all in the pool The guy with no arms takes the lead instantly but the guy with no legs is…

Dick brings a friend to play golf with two of his buddies to complete a foursome. His buddies ask him if his friend can play golf. Dick says that he is very good. This guy hits the ball on the first hole in the bush, so his buddies look at him and say, “You said…

Legendary football announcer Keith Jackson was in Texas to announce a college football game when he noticed a special telephone near the Longhorn’s bench. He asked a nearby Texas player what it was for, and was told that it was the “hotline to God.” Keith asked if he could use it. The player told him,…

There were two old guys, Abe and Sol, sitting on a bench in a park feeding pigeons and talking about baseball, just like they did every day. Abe turns to Sol and says, “Do you think there’s baseball in heaven?” Sol thinks about it for a minute and replies, “I dunno, Abe. But let’s make…