tech

A communication technician drafted by the army was at a firing range. At the range, he was given some instruction, a rifle and 50 rounds. He fired several shots at the target. The report came from the target area that all attempts had completely missed the target. The technician looked at his weapon, and then…

One day, a Mechanical Engineer, Electrical Engineer, Chemical Engineer and Computer Engineer were driving down the street in the same car. The car broke down. The Mechanical Engineer said, “I think a rod broke.” The Chemical Engineer said, “The way it sputtered at the end, I don’t think it’s getting gas.” The Electrical Engineer said,…

Things You Learn from Video Games There is no problem that cannot be overcome by force. If it moves, DESTROY IT! Piloting any vehicle is simple and requires no training. One lone “good guy” can defeat an infinite number of “badguys.” Make sure you eat all food lying on the ground. You can break things…

A mechanical engineer, an electrical engineer and a MCSE (Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer) were out driving, when their car broke down, and they couldn’t get it started. The mechanical engineer suggested that it was a failure somewhere in the drive train, but after checking it out he found that the engine and transmission were fine.…

Yesterday, All those backups seemed a waste of pay. Now my database has gone away. Oh I believe in yesterday. Suddenly, There’s not half the files there used to be, And there’s a milestone hanging over me The system crashed so suddenly. I pushed something wrong What it was I could not say. Now all…

A guy walks into the Microsoft Shop. Guy: I’d like a cheesecake, please. Receptionist: Sure. The receptionist hands him a block of cheese. Guy: Umm… This is just the cheese. Where’s the cake? Rec: You have to purchase that seperately. Guy: What the —-? What kind of product are you trying to sell me? Oh…

There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer. When asked to define “great” he said, “I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl…

A special kind of firework with very bright colors and little smoke was accidentally discovered when a man tried to make the atomic bomb safer. That defeats the original purpose.

Darn those pushy metric system advocates! Give them 2.54 cm., and they’ll take 1.6093 km!

How many diagonals does an N-polygon have? N(N-3)/2.

For those with jobs that require sitting at a computer all day who don’t want to spend the money for those fancy exercise machines, here is a little secret for building arm and shoulder muscles. Three days a week is best. Begin by standing (in your cubicle works well) with a five pound potato sack…

A plain computer illeterate SARDAR rings tech support to report that his computer is faulty. Tech: What’s the problem? Sardaar: There is smoke coming out of the power supply. Tech: You’ll need a new power supply. Sardaar: No, I don’t! I just need to change the startup files. Tech: Sir, the power supply is faulty.…