tech
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The Tech Support Blues
in JokesTech Support: “I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop.” Customer: “OK.” Tech Support: “Did you get a pop-up menu?” Customer: “No.” Tech Support: “OK. Right-click again. So you see a pop-up menu?” Customer: “No.” Tech Support: “OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?” Customer: “Sure. You…
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What We Learn from Movies 2
in Jokes1. Honest and hard-working policemen are traditionally gunned down three days before their retirement. 2. All beds have special L-shaped sheets that reach the armpit level of a woman, but only the waist level of the man lying beside her. 3. At least one of a pair of identical twins is born evil. 4. All…
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Failed Brakes
in JokesAn engineer, a systems analyst, and a programmer were on their way to a tech conference on the other side of the mountains. Half way down the other side, the brakes gave out, and the engineer steered for all his life to keep the car from going clean off the edge. It was at the…
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Oh, My, God
in JokesTech Support Just in case you think you are TC (technologically challenged). The following is an excerpt taken from a Wall Street Journal article: 1. Compaq is considering changing the command “Press Any Key” to “Press Return Key” because of the flood of calls asking where the “Any” key is. 2. AST technical support had…
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Etch-A-Sketch Tech Support
in JokesQ: My Etch-A-Sketch has all of these funny little lines all over the screen. A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: How do I turn my Etch-A-Sketch off? A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: What’s the shortcut for Undo? A: Pick it up and shake it. Q: How do I create a…
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Google Trick
in JokesThis was set up by Google as a joke. Enjoy! Please do the following: 1. Open Google. 2. Type, “french military victories”. 3. Click: I’m Feeling Lucky. 4. Enjoy!
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Who Invented the Snooze Button?
in JokesI want to kick the guy who invented the snooze button…then five minutes later, I’ll kick him again. Thanks Andrew!
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Great Bird
in JokesAnd so at last the beast fell and the unbelievers rejoiced. But all was not lost, for from the ash rose a great bird. The bird gazed down upon the unbelievers and cast fire and thunder upon them. For the beast had been reborn with its strength renewed, and the followers of Mammon cowered in…
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A Classic M$ Support Joke
in JokesA pilot’s flying a small, single-engined charter plane with a couple of really important execs on board. He’s coming into Seattle airport, only there is thick fog, less than 10ft of visibility, and his instruments are out. So he circles around looking for a landmark. After an hour or so, he’s pretty low on fuel…
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A Chatroom Poem
in JokesI was sitting in chat room, Feeling mildly amused, When I saw something strange, That left me all confused. Someone typed a word, (As far as I could tell) But I had never seen it. What is an LOL? Then the plot got thicker, More words I didn’t know, A person started typing, The word…
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The Men Who Swear at Computers
in JokesHave you ever had those days when your computer fucking sucks? Now you have a poem to say! I’m gonna get some Coke and a snack, This should be FUCKING WORKING by the time I get back.