Why the sun lightens our hair,
but darkens our skin?
Why can’t women put on mascara
with their mouth closed?
Why don’t you ever see the headline
“Psychic Wins Lottery”?
Why is “abbreviated” such a long word?
Why is it that doctors call what they do “practice”?
Why is it that to stop Windows 98,
you have to click on “Start”?
Why is lemon juice made with
artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid
made with real lemons?
Why is the man who invests all your money
called a broker?
Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
Why isn’t there mouse-flavored cat food?
When dog food is new and
improved tasting, who tests it?
Why didn’t Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
Why do they sterilize the needle
for lethal injections?
You know that indestructible black box
that is used on airplanes?????
Why don’t they make the whole plane
out of that stuff?!
Why don’t sheep shrink when it rains?
Why are they called apartments
when they are all stuck together?
If con is the opposite of pro,
is Congress the opposite of progress?