Steve Wright II

Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect.

If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happen if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?

Last year I went fishing with Salvador Dali. He was using a dotted line. He caught every other fish.

There’s a fine line between fishing and standing on the shore looking like an idiot.

I didn’t get a toy train like the other kids. I got a toy subway instead. You couldn’t see anything, but every now and then you’d hear this rumbling noise go by.

I used to own an ant farm but had to give it up. I couldn’t find tractors small enough to fit it.

I saw a man with a wooden leg, and a real foot.

I saw a subliminal advertising executive, but only for a second.