I used to be a bartender at the Betty Ford Clinic.
I bought a house, on a one-way dead-end road. I don’t know how I got there.
I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I’m gone.
I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I’m the only one moving.
I watched the Indy 500, and I was thinking that if they left earlier they wouldn’t have to go so fast.
I had to stop driving my car for a while… The tires got dizzy.
My neighbour has a circular driveway… He can’t get out.
I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn’t park anywhere near the place.