5W1H boo!

Jokes

  • Hey FART

    in

    There was a lady that had a 3 year old son and one was coming on the way (she was pregnant). When the 3 year old asked his mother why her stomach was so big, she told him that it was just gas (she didn’t want to give him a confusing explanation). The day that…

  • Look Before You Eat

    in

    Once, a man walked into a bar. He went up to the counter and ordered his drink. The guy next to him had a bowl of chili that he didnt seem to be eating. “Sir, could I bother you for some chili?” he asked very politely. “Go right ahead” he responded, passing the chili. About…

  • 4 Stages in Life

    in

    1st Stage (0-8)- You believe in Santa 2nd Stage (9-26)- You don’t believe in Santa 3rd Stage (27-45)- You are Santa 4th Stage (46-80)- You look like Santa

  • How Do You Get a Blonde to Laugh on Friday?

    in

    How do you get a blonde to laugh on Friday? Tell her a joke on Monday!

  • The Vacuum Cleaner Salesman.

    in

    A little old lady answered her door only to be confronted by a young vacuum cleaner salesman. “Good morning,” said the young man. “If I could take a couple of minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners.” “Go away!” said the old lady. “I haven’t got…

  • Machine

    in

    Yo mamas so dumb she put a quarter in a parking meter and said “Hey! Wheres my gumball?”.

  • Data Centre

    in

    There is an old story about the data centre of the future. This data centre runs 24/7 with only a man and a dog. The man’s job is to feed the dog. The dog’s job is to make sure the man does not touch the computer.

  • Cookbook

    in

    One evening two bachelors were talking over dinner. The conversation drifted from sport to politics, and then to cooking. “I got a cookbook once,” said the bachelor. “But I couldn’t do anything with it.” “Too much fancy stuff in it, huh?” asked his friend. “You said it.” The first guy replied, nodding. “Every one of…

  • Yo Mamas

    in

    Yo mama’s so fat that when she took her first step everyone thought there was an earthquake.

  • Poetic Meter

    in

    A decrepit old gas man named Peter While hunting around for the meter His torch he did light He arose out of sight And, of course, as a result, he totally, completely and utterly destroyed the meter!

  • MY DRINK!!!!

    in

    A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. After a few more he needs to go to the can. He doesn’t want anyone to steal his drink, so he puts a sign on it saying, “I spat in this beer, do not drink!” After a few minutes he returns and there is another…

  • Some More oneliners V

    in

    I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met. I love defenseless animals, especially in a good gravy. Mental backup in progress – Do not disturb! The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes. Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy. Boycott shampoo! Demand…