5W1H boo!

Jokes

  • Bald Man

    in

    What did the bald man say when he was given a comb for his birthday? “Oh, thank you! I’ll never part with it!”

  • States

    in

    What did Tennessee? What Arkansas.

  • Do Not Disturb!

    in

    It might look like I’m doing nothing, but at the cellular level I’m really quite busy.

  • Seminars for Women

    in

    Seminars for Females (Prepared and presented by Males) 1. Elementary map reading 2. Crying and law enforcement 3. Advanced math seminar: Programming your VCR 4. You can go shopping for less than 4 hours 5. Gaining five pounds vs. the end of the world: A study in contrast. 6. PMS: It’s your problem, not mine…

  • A grandson’s coffee

    in

    A Grandmother was surprised by her 7 year old grandson one morning when he had made her coffee. She drank what was the worst cup of coffee in her life. When she got to the bottom there were three of those little green army men in the cup. She said, “Honey, what are the army…

  • Arrested

    in

    You’ll never guess what just happened! I just got arrested for punching a black woman. It wasn’t my fault it was my mom’s. We were in Home Depot when she told me to go find a Black & Decker.

  • Parental Evolution IV

    in

    My wife and I are both the youngest child. Combine that with our own experience as parents and we often satirically talk about how things change as you have more children: The First Time the Child Fell and Got a Cut First child: My wife and I frantically ran over to the child. We swept…

  • Too Embarrassed

    in

    Little David was in his 5th grade class when the teacher asked the children what their fathers did for a living. All the typical answers came up — firefighter, police officer, sales rep, doctor, lawyer, etc. David was being uncharacteristically quiet, so the teacher asked him about his father. “My father’s an exotic dancer in…

  • Viruses you might catch

    in

    THE CLINTON Virus…(Gives you a 7-Inch Hard Drive with NO memory.) THE BOB DOLE (AKA: VIAGRA) virus…(Makes a new hard drive out of an old floppy) THE LEWINSKY virus…(Sucks all the memory out of your computer, then emails your best friends about what it did). THE RONALD REAGAN virus…(Saves your data, but forgets where it…

  • The Old Man and the Sea

    in

    A seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and they take turns telling their adventures on the seas. The seaman notes that the pirate has a peg leg, a hook, and an eye patch. Curious, the seaman asks “So, how did you end up with the peg-leg?” The pirate replies “I was swept overboard into…

  • Fun

    in

    A good friend will come and bail you out of jail…but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, “Damn…that was fun!”??

  • Being Over 50

    in

    Yes, being over 50 does have its advantages… 1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you. 2. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first. 3. No one expects you to run into a burning building. 4. People call at 9 p.m. and ask, “Did I wake you?” 5. People no longer…