Jokes
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Science Lesson
in JokesMiss Jones had been giving her second-grade students a lesson on science. She had explained about magnets and showed how they would pick up nails and other bits of iron. Now it was question time, and she asked, “My name begins with the letter ‘M’ and I pick up things. What am I?” A little…
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Teacher/Train
in JokesWhat’s the difference between a teacher and a train? A teacher says “spit your gum out” and a train says “choo choo!!”
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Another Golf
in JokesAn elderly lady went to a butcher’s shop one day, and noticed that on the liver in the window were two white balls. Being of a curious nature, she asked what these white balls might be, to be told that they were golf balls, and that placing them on the liver kept them supple. She…
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Brake! I Said Brake!
in JokesMy pal is addicted to brake fluid – but he says he can stop any time he wants.
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A Selection
in JokesQ: What do you call it when a blonde dyes her hair brunette? A: Artificial intelligence. Q: When does a brunette have 1/2 of a brain? A: After a dye job. Q: Why does NASA hire peroxide blondes? A: They’re doing research on black holes.
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The Advanced Baby
in JokesA baby was born that was so advanced that he could talk. He looked around the delivery room and saw the doctor. “Are you my doctor?” he asked. “Yes, I am.” The baby said, “Thank you for taking such good care of me during birth.” He looked at his mother and asked, “Are you my…
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Sermon Topic
in JokesA preacher phoned the city’s newspaper. “Thank you very much,” said he, “for the error you made when you announced my sermon topic for last Sunday. The topic I sent you was ‘What Jesus Saw in A Publican.’ You printed it as ‘What Jesus Saw in a Republican’ I had the biggest crowd of the…
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Office Rules
in Jokes1) If it rings, put it on hold. 2) If it clanks, call the repairman. 3) If it whistles, ignore it. 4) If it’s a friend, take a break. 5) If it’s the boss, look busy. 6) If it talks, take notes. 7) If it’s handwritten, type it. 8) If it’s typed, copy it. 9)…