Jokes
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Is it Over Yet?
in JokesAn elderly Italian Jewish man wanted to unburden his guilty conscience by talking to his rabbi. “Rabbi, during World War II, when the Germans entered Italy, I pretended to be a ‘goy’ and changed my name from Levi to Spamoni and I am alive today because of it.” “Self preservation is important and the fact…
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Wrong Wife
in JokesA boy came back from school and noticed that his father was wearing his weeding ring at the wrong finger. He asked his father, “Why are you wearing your ring on the wrong hand and finger?” And the father said,”Because I married the wrong wife.”
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No Balls!
in JokesOne day Little Susie got her “monthly bleeding” for the first time in her life. Having failed to understand what was going on and being really frightened, she decided to share her trouble with little Johnny. Having found Johnny she told and showed him what her problem was. Johnny’s face grew serious and he said,…
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Saddlehorns
in JokesOne day a pretty lady was driving through the desert and her car broke down. In the distance, she sees an indian riding a horse. He rides over to her and offers her a lift to the nearest gas station and she happily accepts. On the way to the gas station, the indian would let…
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Dead Baby Jokes
in JokesQ: What’s funnier than a dead baby? A: A dead baby in a clown costume! Q: What’s the difference between a dead baby and a trampoline? A: When you jump on a trampoline, you take your boots off! Q: What’s blue and flies around the room at high speeds? A: A baby with a punctured…
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Laws of Feline Physics I
in JokesLaw of Cat Inertia A cat at rest will tend to remain at rest, unless acted upon by some outside force â such as the opening of cat food, or a nearby scurrying mouse. Law of Cat Motion A cat will move in a straight line, unless there is a really good reason to change…
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Republican Class
in JokesA teacher in California asked her class, “How many of you are Republicans?” Everyone in the class raised their hands except for one girl. “Mary,” the teacher inquired, “Why didn’t you raise your hand?” “Because I’m not a Republican,” she replied. “I’m a Democrat.” The teacher asked her, “Why are you a Democrat?” And Mary…
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Cat Food Salad
in JokesA very traditional elderly woman was enjoying a good game of bridge with her girlfriends one evening. “Oh, no! I have to rush home and fix dinner for my husband! He’s going to be really ticked if it’s not ready on time!” she exclaimed suddenly. When she got home, she realized that she didn’t have…
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The Best Blind Masseur
in JokesA customer (a middle-aged woman) arrived to have a massage from among the fifteen or so blind masseurs. She came with a side-kick who brought along her things from the office. Approaching the line of masseurs waiting for customers, Lady – in a voice quite loud as to be overheard “They are good masseurs these…