Classified Ads in Newspapers:

FREE PUPPIES: 1/2 COCKER SPANIEL – 1/2 SNEAKY NEIGHBOR’S DOG

1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB — $850/offer

2 WIRE MESH BUTCHERING GLOVES: 1 5-finger, 1 3-finger, PAIR: $15

TICKLE ME ELMO, STILL IN BOX, COMES WITH ITS OWN 1993 MUSTANG, 5L, AUTO, EXCELLENT CONDITION $6800

COWS, NEVER BRED… ALSO 1 GAY BULL FOR SALE.

83 TOYOTA HUNCHBACK — $2000

GERMAN SHEPHERD 85 lbs. NEUTERED. SPEAKS GERMAN. FREE.

FREE 1 CAN OF PORK & BEANS WITH PURCHASE OF 3 BR 2 BATH HOME.

FOR SALE: LEE MAJORS (6 MILLION DOLLAR MAN) – $50

NORDIC TRACK $300 HARDLY USED *************CALL CHUBBIE

NICE PARACHUTE: NEVER OPENED – USED ONCE SLIGHTLY STAINED