Driven to Distraction

– Only in America can a pizza guy get to your door faster than an ambulance.

– Why do slow-down and slow-up mean the same thing?

– Why are wise man and wise guy opposites?

– Why is it that when stuff goes on a truck it’s called a shipment and on a boat it’s called cargo?

– Why do we drive in a parkway and park in a driveway?

– Why do we press harder on things when we know the batteries are dead?