children

A farmer was driving along the road with a load of fertilizer. A little boy, playing in front of his house, saw him and called, “What’ve you got in your truck?” “Fertilizer,” the farmer replied. “What are you going to do with it?” asked the little boy. “Put it on strawberries,” answered the farmer. “You…

The kindergarten teacher is trying to explain to her class the definition of the word “definitely” to them. To make sure the students have a good understanding of the word, she asks them to use it in a sentence. When called upon the first student says, “The sky is definitely blue.” The teacher said, “Well,…

There was a little boy who had just learned to count on his fingers. One day his uncle came to visit and the boy was anxious to show off his newly acquired skill. He told the uncle to ask him an addition question. So the uncle asked, “What is three plus four?” The little boy…

Here are some cute things kids thought up when asked to write about the moon (all the spelling mistakes are original!) The moon is a saterlight. A long time ago a big object hit the Moon and some of the moon fell off. If u look through a telliscope you can see big holes. There…

A teacher is instructing her fourth grade class, and she’s telling them that the word of the day is ‘contagious.’ She asks if anyone can use this word in a sentence, and several students raise their hands. “Carl,” she says. Carl says, “My dad told me to stay away from kids with mumps, ’cause they’re…

Little Johnny was playing with his father’s wallet when he accidently swallowed a quarter. He went crying to his mom, choking on the quarter. They took him to a doctor, who said that the quarter was impossible to remove without surgery, they consulted a specialist who was of the same opinion. Then came a man…

One day, Bob’s class was assigned to write down everything they heard at home. When Bob got home, he heard his mom and dad fighting. “Shut up” he heard his dad say. Bob wrote that down. Next he went to his sister’s room. She was chatting on-line. It just so happened that she said everything…

Hillary Clinton goes to a primary school to talk about the world. After hertalk she offers question time. One little boy puts up his hand, and the Senator asks him what his name is. “Billy,” the lad replies. “And what is your question, Billy?” asks the Senator. I actually have three questions. First – whatever…

This is a true story. Last year my teachers all believed in the, “There is no stupid question” thing, until we started talking about a three day trip our class was going to take. We had just finished talking about room arrangements. My teacher asked for any questions, stating his famous line, “There are no…

Little Mikey’s parents were going out, and Mikey said, “For 20 bucks, Dad, I’ll be good.” “Oh please,” said his father. “When I was your age, I was good for nothing.”

(Answers given by elementary school age children to the following questions.) Why did God make mothers? 1. She’s the only one who knows where the scotch tape is. 2. Mostly to clean the house. 3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. How did God make mothers? 1. He used dirt,…

TEACHER: How old were you on your last birthday? STUDENT: Seven. TEACHER: How old will you be on your next birthday? STUDENT: Nine. TEACHER: That’s impossible. STUDENT: No it isn’t, teacher. I’m eight today. ********************************************************** TEACHER: George, go to the map and find North America. GEORGE: Here it is! TEACHER: Correct. Now, class, who discovered…