children

A lady named Annala had 4 children. They didn’t spent a lot of time together. One day Annala’s husband said,”How about having a picture contest, so we can have a great time! We can invite the whole family; Grandma, Grandpa, and the rest of the gang!” The mother accepted the challenge. The day of the…

A little boy walks into a ice cream parlor to buy ice cream. Worker: Hello little boy, can I help you? Little boy: Yes, I want some chocolate ice cream, please. Worker: Sorry, we’re out of choclate. Little boy: Ok, I’ll have some………..chocolate. Worker: Once again, we’re out of chocolate, pick another flavor. Little boy:…

The Bathroom Door is Closed. Please do not stand here and talk, whine, or ask questions. Wait until I get out. Yes, it is locked. I want it that way. It is not broken. I am not trapped. I know I have left it unlocked, and even open at times, since you were born, because…

Why did the bubblegum cross the road? Because he was stuck to the chickens leg.

A little girl went into the barber shop to get a haircut. When the barber was cutting her hair he realized she was eating a little debbie snack. He said, “Sweetie, you’re going to get hair on your twinkie.” The little girl answered, “I know, and I’m going to get boobs, too.”

Little Emily was complaining to her mother that her stomach hurt. Her mother replied, “That’s because it’s empty. Maybe you should try putting something in it.” The next day, the pastor was over at Emily’s family’s house for lunch. He mentioned having his head hurt, to which Emily immediately replied, “That’s because it’s empty. Maybe…

A Girl went up to her mother and asked, “Mum, is Amsterdam a swear word?” “No, why?” She asked. “Is Rotterdam a swear word?” she asked. “No, why?” her mother repeated. “Well, I heard little sister talking behind my back after I showed her my lollipop, and she said ‘I hope that that lollipop rot…

Teacher: Can you pay a little attention to this lesson?! Pupil: I am trying my best to pay as little attention as I can!!

Max: Here I am, once again! I’m torn into pieces…can’t deny it, can’t pretend! Just thought you were the one! Broken up, deep inside. But you don’t get to see these tears I cry….BEHIND THESE HAZEL EYES! Bailey: So, wha’d you do with the money? Max: What money??? Bailey: The money your mom gave you…

There once were two babies both in the same room, with their cribs next to each other. After their mom tucked the babies in for sleep, one baby went to the other baby and said, “I can tell if you are a girl or a boy.” The other baby said, “OK, what am I then?”…

Little Johnny is approached by the lifeguard at the public swimming pool. “You’re not allowed to pee in the pool,” says the lifeguard. “I’m going to report you.” “But everyone pees in the pool,” whined Little Johnny. “Maybe,” answered the lifeguard, “but not from the diving board!”

A middle school student was working at a shop for his after-school job. He had on a Dairy Queen shirt. A kindergarten student walked up to him and said, “Wow, I have 3 of those shirts! You must be cheap!”