menwomen

A man left for work one Friday afternoon, but since it was payday, he stayed out the entire weekend partying with the boys and spending his entire paycheck instead of just going straight home. When he finally appeared at home on Sunday night, he was confronted by a very angry wife and a two-hour tirade…

I. Why does a man wants to have a WIFE? Because: W = Washing I = Ironing F = Food E = Entertainment. Why does a woman wants to have a HUSBAND? Because: H = Housing U = Understanding S = Sharing B = Buying A = and N = Never D = Demanding. II.…

One day a girl brings home her boyfriend and tells her father she wants to marry him. After talking to him for while, he tells his daughter she can’t do it because he’s her half brother. The same problem happens again four more times! The girl starts to get pissed off. She goes to her…

What’s the difference between a golf ball and a woman’s G-spot? A man will spend 20 minutes looking for a golf ball!

John got off the elevator on the 50th floor and nervously knocked on his blind date’s door. She opened it and was as beautiful and charming as everyone had said. “I’ll be ready in a few minutes,” she said. “Why don’t you play with Spot, my dog, while you’re waiting?” He does wonderful tricks. He…

After they’d brought their first baby home from the hospital, a young wife suggested to her husband that he try his hand at changing diapers. “I’m busy,” he said. “I’ll do the next one.” The next time the baby was wet, she asked if he was now ready to learn how to change diapers. He…

Women need a reason to have sex, men just need a place!

In a small town, farmers of the community had gotten together to discuss some important issues. About midway through the meeting, a wife of one of the farmers stood up and spoke her piece. When she was done, one of the old farmers stood up and said, “What does she know about anything? I would…

“The attractive man I met last night insists he just wants to be friends,” the girl told her Aunt. “Now I know what to do with a lover, but what the heck do I do with a ‘friend’?” The wise old lady smiled and said, “The same as with your lover, dearie, only not quite…

A little guy is seated next to a big guy at a bar and asks his name. The big guy says, “They call me Tex.” The little guy replies, “Oh, you must be from Texas.” The big guy says, “Nope. I’m from Louisiana.” “Hmmm,” the little guy replies, “Then why do they call you Tex?”…

There is a man in his back yard trying to fly a kite. He throws the kite up in the air, the wind catches it for a few seconds then it comes crashing back down. He tries this a few more times all the while his wife is watching from her kitchen window. Muttering to…

A woman was chatting with her next-door neighbor. “I feel really good today. I started out this morning with an act of unselfish generosity. I gave a five dollar bill to a bum.” “You gave a bum five whole dollars? That’s a lot of money to just give away. What did your husband say about…