oneliners

Join the fight against brutality.

What’s an innunedo? An Italian hemorrhoid prepareation. What do you call a good looking girl on the campus of Clemson University? A visitor. Iraq, a good place to take a shiite. New rules for poker in Los Angeles — four clubs beat a king. Why are all dumb blonde jokes oneliners? So men can understand…

An elderly couple was attending Mass. About halfway through, the wife leans over and says to her husband, ‘I just let out a silent fart; what do you think I should do? He replies, ‘Put a new battery in your hearing aid.’

Cinfuscious says : It is nice to meet a woman in the park but is better to park meat in a woman.

Team has no “I” in it, but it does have a “M” and “E” in it, making “me”.

A lot of people ask me if I were shipwrecked, and could only have one book, what would it be? I always say, “How to Build a Boat”. – Steven Wright.

You can fool some of the people all of the time and all of the people some of the time, but you can never fool a Mom.

What has a whole bunch of little balls and screws old ladies? A bingo machine

Whoever said nothing is impossible has never tried slamming a revolving door.

Any horizontal surface is soon piled up.

A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it because the thief was spending less than his wife did.

What trees do in Spring. (re-leaf)