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Two atoms are walking down the street when one atom says to the other, “I think I lost an electron.” The other atom says “Are you sure?” “Yeah I’m positive!”

140 Ice Cream was discovered by Gerald Tisyum 141 The number regarded as lucky number in Italy is thirteen 142 Napoleon suffered from alurophobia which means fear of cats 143 The aeroplanes was used in war for the first time by Italians (14 Oct.1911) 144 Slavery in America was abolished by Abraham Lincoln 145 The…

Why is it that every time we blow our noses, we look inside the tissue afterwards? Are we expecting something other than boogers? Or are we checking to make sure they have not run off?

One guy went to see a doctor because he had a hearing problem, so he met his friend and the conversation began! First guy: “Did the doctor give you your test results?” Second guy: “Yeah. Looks like all those years of phone sex caught up with me. I have hearing AIDS.”

An Australian travel writer touring Canada was checking out of the Vancouver Hilton. As he paid his bill, he said to the manager, “By the way, what’s with the Indian chief sitting in the lobby? He’s been there ever since I arrived.” “Oh, that’s Big Chief Forget-Me-Not,” said the manager. “The hotel is built on…

HOW TO GET A TAN WITH A BLOWTORCH HOW TO BE FUNNY by Gilbert Gottfried MY PLAN TO FIND THE REAL KILLERS by O J Simpson ZAGAT’S GUIDE TO CITIES WITHOUT A STARBUCKS THE ENGINEER’S GUIDE TO FASHION TO ALL THE MEN I’VE LOVED BEFORE by Ellen DeGeneres THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN REALITY AND DILBERT FAST…

Today I picked up my mother-in-law at the airport. She’s getting a little up there. She’s at the age where she doesn’t remember things too well. So when I saw her I said, “Thanks for coming. Have a nice flight!”

A student on a class trip to the natural-history museum asks the guard, “Can you tell me how old the dinosaur bones are?” The guard tells him, “Three-million-four years and six months old.” The student says. “How do you know that so precisely?” The guard says, “Well, the dinosaur bones were three million years old…

Once upon a time, a man happened upon a magical lamp. He rubbed it and a genie came out. “Are you going to give me three wishes?” the man asked. “No,” said the genie. “I am a rare and mystical question genie. I am way more honorable than a simple wish genie! You may ask…

A police officer pulled over a driver and informed him that because he was wearing his seat belt, he had just won $5,000 in a safety competition. “What are you going to do with the prize money?” the officer asked. The man responded, “I guess I’ll go to driving school and get my license.” At…

Top Ten Reasons to Procrastinate 1.

Report of a duel between Alexander Shott and John Nott, in June 1849. Nott was shot and Shott was not. In this case, it is better to be Shott than Nott. Some said that Nott was not shot, but Shott says that he shot Nott. It may be that the shot Shott shot, shot Nott,…