This is a list of what I have learned so far in my life:
1.) Always smile. It makes adults wonder what you’re up to.
2.) Golf is no longer a rich man’s sport. There are millions of poor players.
3.) If at first you DO succeed, try to hide your astonishment.
4.) It takes a thousand nuts and bolts to put a car together, yet just one nut to scatter it all over the road.
5.) NEVER play leapfrog with a unicorn.
6.) NEVER ask your dad to help you with your math homework, unless you want a 4-hour lecture.
7.) When things look black, send them to the laundry.
8.) Be tolerant of those who disagree with you. After all, they’re entitled to their stupid opinions!