Jokes
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Please Do This
in JokesOk, now the last time I did this, I got a lot of comments saying that there’s no point, and they only submit things they think is funny and blah blah blah. Well, anyways, I’m planning to do this…. again.. and by the way, I think it’d be extremely funny. Everyone, please give this a…
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Have a First Child
in JokesA man and his wife were making their first doctor visit, the wife being pregnant with their first child. After everything checked out, the doctor took a small stamp and stamped the wife’s stomach with indelible ink. The couple was curious about what the stamp read, so when they got home, the husband got out…
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Build an Ark
in JokesThe Lord said to Noah, “In six months, I’m going to make it rain until the earth is covered with water and all the evil is destroyed. I want you to build an ark and save two of each animal species. Here are the blueprints for the ark.” Six months passed. The skies began to…
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Mr Bean in Brain Tumour
in JokesDoctor: I regret to tell you that you have a brain tumor. Mr. Bean: Yesss!!! (jumps in joy) Doctor: Did you understand what I just told you? Mr. Bean: Yes of course, do you think I’m dumb? Doctor: Then why are you so happy? Mr. Bean: Because that proves that I have a brain!
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Only One God
in JokesThere was a atheist and his son dicussing religion. The young man later brought up the discussion with his friends, who explained to him the concept on the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. That day the man went home and told his father that there were three gods and explained to him what…
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Let’s Vote on This Now
in JokesBill Clinton, George Bush, and Ronald Reagan are in a boat in the Potomac, when suddenly the boat develops a leak. They have only one life preserver jacket. Bill says: “Let’s do the Democratic thing. Take a vote to see who gets the life preserver.” They each write a name on a piece of paper…
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Roy’s Cowboy Boots
in JokesAnyone remember Roy Clark, host of TV’s “Hee Haw”? Once, cohost Buck Owens was visiting Roy’s home in the foothills of the Rocky Mountains. Roy was upset because he had just bought a beautiful new pair of genuine leather boots that were completely destroyed by a mountain lion the night before when Roy had left…
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You are a Redneck If… #24
in JokesYou are a redneck if: you’ve ever dislodged a sunflower seed from the corner of your eye.
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Two Potatoes
in JokesTwo Potatoes are standing on a street corner. How do you know which one is a hooker? It’s the one stamped I-da-Ho (Idaho potato)
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A Priest and a Rabbi…
in JokesA priest and a rabbi found themselves sharing a compartment on a train. After a while, the priest put down his book and opened a conversation by saying, “I know that, in your religion, you’re not supposed to eat pork… but have you really never even tasted it?” The rabbi closed his newspaper and responded,…