Jokes
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Top 10 Ways to Tell that You’re a New Dad
in Jokes10) Getting six hours of sleep is a privilege. 9) The sentence, “Honey, could you take his foot out of my pocket?” sounds normal. 8) You are used to doing everything one-handed. 7) The thought of your mother-in-law coming over for a few hours is a pleasant one. 6) The list of bodily fluids that…
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Yo Momma Jokes… The Wad Lode!
in JokesYo momma so fat, when she wears a yellow shirt and goes outside, the sun gets jealous! Yo momma so ugly, I don’t know who you and her are related! Yo momma so old, fat, ugly, and stupid, people are still wondering why your dad married her! Yo momma so stupid, she cheated off herself!…
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Attention Students!
in JokesStudents… Take Note: Knowledge is power … But power corrupts … And corruption is a crime … And crime doesn’t pay … So if you keep on studying you’ll go broke!
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Wealthy 60-year-old
in JokesBob, an extremely wealthy 60-year-old, arrives at a country club with a beautiful and charming 25-year-old blonde. His buddies at the club are all aghast. They corner him and ask, “Bob, how’d you get the trophy girlfriend?” Bob exclaims, “Girlfriend? She’s my wife!” His friends are shocked, but continue to ask, “So, how’d you persuade…
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A Lawyer and the Pope Die and Go to Heaven
in JokesA lawyer died, and at the same moment, the Pope also died. They arrived at the gates of heaven together. They spend the day in orientation, and as they’re getting their heavenly vestments, the Pope gets a plain white toga and wings, like everyone else, and the lawyer gets much finer apparel, made of gold…
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The Best Blonde Jokes
in JokesQ: Why do blondes insist on guys wearing condoms? A: So they’ll have a doggie bag for later. Q: What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant? A: “Are you sure it’s mine?” Q: What’s the difference between a blonde and a walrus? A: One has whiskers and fishy flaps, the…
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You Know Your a Redneck…..
in JokesYou know your a redneck when there are 15 cars in your driveway, and the only one that moves is your house.
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Dirty Floor
in JokesYour floor is so dirty, I stepped inside and said “Nice carpet.” You said, “Man, those are cockroaches!”