Jokes
-
How old am I?
in JokesSome people grow old gracefully, while others fight and scratch the whole way. Andy’s wife, refusing to give in to the looks of growing old, goes out and buys a new line of expensive cosmetics guaranteed to make her look years younger. After a lengthy sitting before the mirror applying the “miracle” products, she asks…
-
We’re All Screwed
in JokesYou know what? Everyjoke is screwed these days. In the office, you’re screwed if you don’t do you’re job well. At home, You’re screwed if you don’t listen to your parents. At school/college, You’re screwed by many- Teachers, bullies, the principal etc… And they say we’re all screwed on December 21st 2012! But, these things…
-
Electric Chair
in JokesA murderer was secured to the electric chair, about to be executed. The chaplain approached him and asked, “Do you have any last requests?” “Yes,” replied the murderer. “Would you hold my hand?”
-
7 Dwarfs and the Pope
in JokesSleepy just ran back into the house after reading the newspaper and exclaimed, “Everyone! Everyone, the Pope is coming to town this weekend!” Grumpy replies, “Great! Now we can ask him the question!” The weekend rolls around and they stand in line to speak to the pope, it’s finally their turn and they send up…
-
Deer Hunting
in JokesGeorge Bush senior and junior were dragging the deer they had just shot back to their truck. Another hunter approached, pulling his along, too. “Sirs, I don’t want to tell you how to do something,” he said, “but I can tell you that it’s much easier if you drag the deer the other way, then…
-
Diplomat Wants Water
in JokesAn Arab diplomat visiting the U.S. for the first time was being wined and dined by the State Department. The Grand Emir was unused to the salt in American foods (french fries, cheeses, salami, anchovies etc.) and was constantly sending his manservant Abdul to fetch him a glass of water. Time and again, Abdul would…
-
The Court Case
in JokesThis is a true story. This happened many years ago, and was told me by a man with spare time on his hands, who used to spectate in court to pass some of that spare time. Lawyer – “You say you saw the defendant’s car involved in a road accident at the junction of X…
-
Friday the 13th
in JokesBOB- It’s Friday the 13th. Do you have any superstitions? GEORGE- I think it’s unlucky to have superstitions.
-
Blowing Up Blonds
in JokesQ: Why is it okay for blondes to catch a cold? A: No need for them to worry about blowing their brains out.