5W1H boo!

Jokes

  • Most Common Phrase

    in

    If the most common phrase in your house is “Somejoke go jiggle the handle!”… you might be a redneck.

  • Q & A

    in

    Q: What’s red and goes up and down? A: A tomato in an elevator. Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A: We have to stick together. Q: What do you say when you meet a two-headed monster? A: Hello, hello. Q: What do you call a sleeping…

  • Official Rules

    in

    Registered users win points for submitting and voting on jokes.

  • Some Blond Jokes

    in

    A blonde was filling out an application form. She quickly filled in the columns for Name; Age; Address et c. When she came to the column Salary Expected, she put “Yes.” At an air show, the blonde turned to her partner and said, “I wouldn’t like to be up there in one of those!” Her…

  • Beautiful?

    in

    There was a lawyer and he was just waking up from anesthesia after surgery, and his wife was sitting by his side. His eyes fluttered open and he said, “You’re beautiful!” and then he fell asleep again. His wife had never heard him say that so she stayed by his side. A couple minutes later…

  • Grapes

    in

    What does a grape say when it gets squished? Nothing, it just lets out a little whine.

  • One Summer Evening…

    in

    One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her son into bed. She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor in his voice, “Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?” The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug. “I can’t dear,” she said. “I have…

  • Bull and Train

    in

    A big-city lawyer was representing the railroad in a lawsuit filed by an old rancher. The rancher’s prize bull was missing from the section through which the railroad passed. The rancher only wanted to be paid the fair value of the bull. The case was scheduled to be tried before the justice of the peace…

  • The Tollbooth

    in

    The driver of a huge trailer lost control of his rig, plowed into an empty tollbooth and smashed it to pieces. He climbed down from the wreckage and within a matter of minutes, a truck pulled up and discharged a crew of workers. The men picked up each broken piece of the former tollbooth and…

  • Dishwater

    in

    A young bride and groom-to-be had just selected their wedding rings. As the young lady admired the plain platinum and diamond band she had chosen for herself, she suddenly looked concerned. “Tell me,” she asked the rather elderly salesman, “is there anything special I’ll have to do to take care of this ring?” With a…

  • Signs and Notices

    in

    These are supposedly actual signs that have appeared at various locations across the United States and rest of the world. Sign on a repair shop door: WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR – THE BELL DOESN’T WORK) Sign at Norfolk farm gate: BEWARE! I SHOOT EVERY TENTH TRESPASSER AND THE NINTH…

  • Lenin, Stalin, Khrushchev and Brezhnev

    in

    Lenin, Stalin, Khrushchev and Brezhnev are all travelling together in a railway carriage. Unexpectedly, the train stops. Lenin suggests: “Perhaps we should call a subbotnik, so that workers and peasants fix the problem.” Stalin puts his head out of the window and shouts, “If the train does not start moving, the driver will be executed!”…