5W1H boo!

Jokes

  • Chocolate

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    Q. Why are families like chocolate? A. They are mostly sweet, with a few nuts!

  • You Know You’ve Been Drinking Way Too Much Coffee When…

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    You Know You’ve Been Drinking Way Too Much Coffee When… Juan Valdez named his donkey after you. You haven’t blinked since the last lunar eclipse. You just completed another sweater and you don’t know how to knit. The only time you’re standing still is during an earthquake. The nurse needs a scientific calculator to take…

  • Psychic

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    I am not a believer in seances, but I went to one just to see what they are like. The psychic was doing his thing and grinning from ear to ear. I assumed his merriment was due to the fact that he was fooling a gullible public and gave him a poke in the nose.…

  • Show

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    Yo momma so fat, when she walks in front of the T.V., you miss 5 minutes of your show!

  • Legend

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    A foot. (leg-end)

  • Only in America

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    1. Only in America . . . can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance. 2. Only in America . . . are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink. 3. Only in America . . . do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back…

  • I was Thinking

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    All you see in the sport media nowadays is the fact that athletes are taking steriods and other performance enhanceing drugs to become stronger and faster. So instead of going out and buying a new car I put some steriods in the gas tank…. I wonder if I will get the same result?

  • Dog Bite

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    A man walks into a pub and sits down next to a man with a dog at his feet. “Does your dog bite?” “No.” A few minutes later the dog takes a huge chunk out of his leg. “I thought you said your dog didn’t bite!” the man says indignantly. “That’s not my dog.”

  • Valentines

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    A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing “Love” stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them. His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes…

  • Resume

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    OBJECTIVE To sit in a cubicle and stare at a monitor for eight hours, occasionally looking attentive when approached by a superior. EDUCATION School: Very Expensive Major: Not Important GPA: Don’t Ask EMPLOYMENT NETWORK MANAGEMENT (9/96-Present) Produced daily itinerary of television programs to watch. Duties included changing channels, avoiding infomercials, and staying tuned after those…

  • Kid Vs. Old

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    if stealing kids is kidnapping,is stealing adults oldnapping?

  • No Chance Pick Up Lines

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    Did you fart….Because you are blowing me away!!! My two favorite letters of the alpabet E Z. Hey, I lost my underwear, can I see yours? Hey baby, have you fallen from heaven, because that would explain your face.. Can i buy you a drink? Because you look like an alcoholic. Do you believe in…