Jokes
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Actual Personals From Jewish Newspapers
in JokesDivorced Jewish man seeks partner to attend shul with, light Shabbos candles, celebrate holidays, build Sukkah together, attend brisses and bar Mitzvahs. Religion not important. ***** Israeli professor, 41, with 18 years of teaching in my behind. Looking for American-born woman who speaks English very good.I am a sensitive Jewish prince to whom you can…
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Bowling Ball
in JokesHow are a bowling ball and a sorority girl alike? You can pick them up, stick your fingers in them, and throw them in the gutter and they’ll always come back.
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Why are There So Many Smiths…
in JokesQ: Why are there so many Smiths in the phone book? A: They all have phones.
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A Bear and a Rabbit
in JokesA bear and a rabbit are walking together and they find a magic lamp. They decide to rub it and a genie comes out. The genie says, “Thank you for releasing me I will give you both 3 wishes.” The bear thinks and says, “I wish all the other bears in this forest were lady…
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A little girl wants to go
in JokesA little nine-year-old girl was in church with her mother when she started feeling ill. “Mommy” she said “Can we leave now?” “No,” her mother replied. “Well, I think I have to throw up!” “Then go out the front door and around to the back of the church and throw up behind a bush.” In…
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All Under Control
in JokesAnother Month Ends: All Targets Met, All Systems Working, All Customers Satisfied, All Staff Eager and Enthusiastic, All Pigs Fed and Ready to Fly.
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Mass Use of Brains
in JokesCNN gets news that 100 blonds are killed in a train accident at Marylebone station. Only one blond left alive. The correspondent goes to her and asks, “Miss, how did it happen?” Blond: “Oh don’t ask about it. All were right as long as all were waiting on the platform for the train. Then came…
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What is a Kentucky Virgin?
in JokesQuestion: What is a Kentucky Virgin? Answer: A really ugly seven year old girl who can run faster than her older brother.
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12 Redneck Days of Cristmas
in JokesOn the 12th day of Christmas my true love sent to me 12- Pack of Bud 11 Rasslin’ Tickets 10 tins of Copenhagen 9 Years Probation 8 Holey vests 7 Kissing Cousins 6 Cans of Spam 5 Hunting Hounds 4 Mudgrip tyres 3 Shot Gun Shells 2 more Gaps in Teeth And some parts to…