5W1H boo!

Jokes

  • The Art Of Grading

    in

    Here is a list of the ways professors grade their final exams: DEPT OF STATISTICS: All grades are plotted along the normal bell curve. DEPT OF PSYCHOLOGY: Students are asked to blot ink in their exam books, close them and turn them in. The professor opens the books and assigns the first grade that comes…

  • A Few Jokes

    in

    Did you hear about the blonde who took an hour to cook Minute Rice? Did you hear about the blonde who got into the taxi, and the driver kept the “Vacant” sign up? Did you hear about the blonde who was an M.D.–Mentally Deficient? Did you hear about the blonde who thought nitrates was cheaper…

  • Chinese Laundry

    in

    A woman was unhappy with the way her laundry was done at the local Chinese Laundry, so she wrote a note and put it in the bag with the next collection of soiled clothes : “USE MORE SOAP ON PANTIES!” She got the clean laundry back, and was still dissatisfied with the results, so the…

  • Top Ten Ways to Freak Out Your Roommate

    in

    10) Collect potatoes. Paint faces on them and give them names. Name one after your roommate. Separate your roommate’s potato from the others. Wait a few days, and then bake your roommate’s potato and eat it. Explain to your roommate, “He just didn’t belong.” 9) Move everything to one side of the room. Ask your…

  • Sick Blonde

    in

    A blonde came home from her first day commuting into the city. Her mother noticed she was looking a little peaked and asked, “Honey, are you feeling all right?” “Not really,” the blonde replied. “I’m nauseous from sitting backward on the train.” “Poor dear,” Mom said. “Why didn’t you ask the person sitting across from…

  • Beer Please

    in

    After Great Britain’s Beer Festival, all the brewery presidents decided it would be fun to hit a pub in London and go out for a beer. The first sits down and says, “Hey, Senor, I would like the world’s best beer, a Corona.” The bartender dusts off a bottle from the shelf and gives it…

  • Did U?

    in

    did u have a pussy around ur head?

  • Lovely Little Sister

    in

    Seven-year-old Timmy had been the center of his parents’ lives up until the time his new baby sister came along. He found it very difficult to share their attention and was becoming more and more jealous. When his little sister was a year old, his parents took him aside and told him that since she…

  • Fancy Watch

    in

    Jake is struggling through a bus station with two huge and obviously heavy suitcases when a stranger walks up to him and asks “Have you got the time?” Jake sighs, puts down the suitcases and glances at his wrist. “It’s a quarter to six,” he says. “Hey, that’s a pretty fancy watch!” exclaims the stranger.…

  • So… fat

    in

    Yo momma is so fat that she is on both sides of the family!

  • On the First Day…

    in

    On the first day of their Honeymoon, the blonde bride slipped into a sexy but sweet nightie and, with great anticipation, crawled into bed, only to find that her new Catholic husband had settled down on the couch. When she asked him why he was apparently not going to make love to her, he replied,…

  • So What?

    in

    JUDGE: “The court can produce a dozen witnesses who saw you rob the bank.” ROBBER: “Big deal! I can bring in hundreds of people who didn’t see it!”