Jokes
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Her Late Husband
in JokesA woman, who had just been married to a gambling man, had learned upon marrying him that he always came home well after midnight. She didn’t like this one bit, and no amount of reasoning with him would make him miss a night out with the guys, so every night for a week she would…
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Private Part Died
in JokesAn old man, Mr. Goldstein, was living the last of his life in a nursing home. One day he appeared to be very sad and depressed. Nurse Tracy asked if there was anything wrong. “Yes, Nurse Tracy,” said Mr. Goldstein, “My private part died today, and I am very sad.” Knowing her patients were forgetful…
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Weary Soldier
in JokesThe train was very crowded, so the soldier walked the length of the train, looking for an empty seat. The only unoccupied seat was directly adjacent to a well-dressed middle-aged lady and was being used by her little dog. The war-weary soldier asked: “Please, ma’am, may I sit in that seat?” The English woman looked…
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All Choked Up
in JokesTwo cowboys from Arkansas walk into a roadhouse to wash the trail dust from their throats. They stand at the bar, drinking their beers and talking quietly about cattle prices. Suddenly a woman at a table behind them who had been eating a sandwich begins to cough. After few moments it becomes apparent that she…
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Over Qualified
in JokesA young man hired by a supermarket reported for his first day of work. The manager greeted him with a warm handshake and a smile, gave him a broom and said, “Your first job will be to sweep the entire store.” “But I’m a college graduate,” the young man replied indignantly. “Oh, I’m sorry. I…
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Tarzan Swings
in JokesTarzan swings through the air Tarzan loses his underwear Tarzan says “Me no care, Jane make me another pair.” Boy swings through the air Boy loses his underwear Boy says “Me no care, Jane make me another pair.” Cheetah swings through the air Cheetah loses his underwear Cheetah says “Me no care, Jane make me…
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Johnny Appleseed
in JokesLittle Johnny asks his teacher: “How are the babies made?” Teacher, not wanting to take the responsibility of explaining such a sensitive subject, suggests that he go home and ask his parents. When he gets home, Johnny approaches his father with the same question. His father replies, “Oh! that is a long story, you better…
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Lightbulbs
in JokesQ: How many people does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Depends on how many lightbulbs need changing.
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WhoWhatWhenWhereWhichHow
in JokesA person soon learns how little he knows when a child begins to ask questions.
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Rise and Shine
in JokesA mother complained to a doctor about her daughter’s strange eating habits. “All day long she lies in bed and eats yeast and car wax. What will happen to her?” “Don’t worry,” said the doctor. “Eventually, she’ll rise and shine.