Jokes
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Collection of “You Know You’re a Redneck When…” Number 2
in JokesManaged to remember some MORE Redneck lines while hearing a couple more. You know you’re a redneck when: You lost your virginity at the age of 11. You need an estimate from your barber before you get a haircut. Taking a dip has nothing to do with water. There are more than ten lawsuits currently…
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Messed Up Names
in JokesIn a messed up family, the child named Hope is goth, and the child named Faith is atheist.
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Advantages
in JokesA not necessarily well-prepared college student sat in his life science classroom, staring at a question on the final exam paper. The question directed “Give four advantages of breast milk.” What to write?” He sighed, and began to scribble whatever came into his head, hoping for the best: 1. No need to boil. 2. Never…
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Christmas
in JokesAs a little girl climbed onto Santa’s lap, Santa asked the usual, “And what would you like for Christmas?” The child stared at him open mouthed and horrified for a moment, then gasped – “Didn’t you get my E-mail?” A 7-year old child was drawing a picture of the Nativity. The picture was very good,…
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Fishing Lure
in JokesA couple of young boys were fishing at their special pond off the beaten track. All of a sudden, the Game Warden jumped out of the bushes. Immediately, one of the boys threw his rod down and started running through the woods like a bat out of hell. The Game Warden was hot on his…
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Super Bowl
in JokesA new arrival in Hell was brought before the devil. The devil told his demon to put the man to work on a rock pile with a 20 pound sledge hammer in 95 degree heat with 95% humidity. At the end of the day, the devil went to see how the man was doing, only…
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Macho Men?
in JokesSome men will got to extraordinary lengths to prove how macho they are. Frenchman Pierre Pumpille recently shunted a stationary car two feet by headbutting it. “Women thought I was a god,” he explained from his hospital bed. Deity or not, however, Pumpille is a veritable girl’s blouse compared to Polish farmer Krystof Azninski, who…
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The Job
in JokesA blonde was recently fired from her cashier job, because she kept stealing money from the register. She went looking for work the next day. A few days later, she came to a man who needed someone. “I’m here for the paint job”, the blonde said eagerly. “Alright. Take this paint and brush, and go…
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E-Mail Screw-ups
in JokesE-Mail Screw-ups. Many Universities, colleges and businesses tend to strip the last name down to 6 characters and add the first and last initial to either the begining or end to make up an e-mail address, i.e. Mary L. Ferguson = mlfergus or fergusml. They are just now beginning to realize the problems that may…
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College Son
in JokesThe farmer and his wife had worked hard, they scrimped and saved to send their son to college. As soon as he had enrolled, he started to grow a beard. Next he grew a large mustache and sideburns. Being pleased with his new hirsute adornment, he had his picture taken and sent it off to…