5W1H boo!

Jokes

  • More Than A Few oneliners

    in

    My bedroom is so small… The mice are hunchbacked. I shut the door and and the doorknob was in bed with me. I have to go outside to change my mind. If I stand up, I’m on the second floor.

  • 5 Blonde Jokes

    in

    1 A dumb blonde was bragging about her knowledge of the state capitals of the United States. She proudly announced, “Go ahead, ask me any of the capitals, I know all of them.” A red head said, “O.K., what’s the capital of Wyoming?” The blonde replied, “Oh, that’s easy, ‘W’.” 2 A blonde was telling…

  • Swimming Pool

    in

    How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool.

  • Promotion

    in

    There I was, in my car, driving down the road, when my boss rang up and said, “We’re making you Chief Area Salesman,” and I swerved. Ten minutes later, he called again, “You’re now Deputy Area Manager,” and I swerved again. Another twenty minutes go by, and another phone call, “You’re now Vice Chairman,” and…

  • Two Prostitutes

    in

    Two prostitutes were riding around town with a sign on top of their car which said: “Two Prostitutes — $50.00.” A policeman, seeing the sign, stopped them and told them they’d either have to remove the sign or go to jail. Just at that time, another car passed with a sign saying: “JESUS SAVES.” One…

  • Moths

    in

    The lovers passionately embraced on her bed, their bodies fused together as they gyrated to their own tattoo. The woman cocked her ear, “Quick! My husband’s coming through the front door! Hide in the bathroom!” she cried. The lover ran into the bathroom as she hid his clothes under the bed and as she turned…

  • Our House

    in

    Our house, in the middle of my feet, Our house, which smells of cheesy feet, Our house, will always get defeat, Our house, will never eat those feet. That was a song I made up ha!!!!!! ha!!!!!! ha!!!!!! ha!!!!!!!

  • Pizza

    in

    There’s a blonde who goes to a pizza parlor. When she orders, she asks for her pizza to be cut up into 6 slices instead of eight. Why? A: She’s not hungry enough to eat eight.

  • Dr and the Drunk

    in

    A drunk goes to the doctor complaining of tiredness and headaches. ‘I feel tired all the time,’ he slurs, ‘My head hurts, I’ve got a sore bum, and I’m not sleeping. What is it doc?’ Frowning the doctor examines him thoroughly before standing back. ‘I can’t find anything wrong,’ he says.’It must be the drinking.’…

  • Copperwire

    in

    How was copper wire invented? Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.

  • bargain

    in

    Always on the look-out for a bargain, I was dining out and came across a menu entree “T-Bone* $4.25”. I inquired of the waiter how they could sell a dinner at that price. He advised me to check the bottom of the menu. Next to the “*” was “with meat, $14.95”

  • Dog Fight

    in

    A guy walks into a bar with his dog on a leash the barman says, “Geez that’s a weird dog; he’s stumpy-legged, pink, and doesn’t have a tail, but I bet my rottweiler would beat the heck out of it.” 50 bucks is laid down. Out in the yard the rottweiler gets mauled to pieces.…