Hey, Dominic!

There were two high school friends, Artie and Dominick, who did everything together, and were the absolute best of friends. Then they went off to different colleges and were separated for several years.
One day, however, Artie was sitting and a bar and looks over and sees his old friend Dominic.
“Dominic?” he shouts.
“Artie?” Dominic replied.
Obviously they were happy to see each other again, and spent a long time catching up on old times. Along the course of the conversation, Artie asked Dominick what he did as a career.
“I’m an inventor,” Dominic said.
“Wow,” said Artie, “you must be loaded!”
“Well, I would be, except my wife spends all my money. I really hate her and wish she were dead!”
“Well, hey,” Artie said, “I’m a hit man! I can knock her off for ya!”
Dominick was pleased with this idea, and offered Artie a great deal of money to do this. Artie, however would not take it, saying that it would be free for his best friend. Dominick felt bad about this, and kept trying to pay SOMETHING to Artie, but he refused. Finally Dominic said, “Listen, let me pay you, all right? Just a dollar, okay? A dollar to say that I paid you. Please?” Finally, Artie agreed to the cost of one dollar, and the plans were made.
Later, while Dominic was away, Artie went to his house and strangled his wife. Just as she died, the butler walked into the room, so Artie strangled him as well. Seconds after his death, in walked the maid, so once again, he was forced to strangle another person. Finally, after she was dead, he raced out of the house and down the street, but was caught by the police.

Next day the headlines read: